Couples do WHAT??

I saw an astounding statistic this week: “Couples bicker an average of 2,455 times a year.”

What?? That’s 6.7 times per day. This is “average”? I think Don and I bicker maybe once or twice per year. Maybe.

As it  turns out, this claim dates back to a survey among British couples conducted in 2011. I wasn’t able to find the original survey. Whether the statistic is still considered accurate or not is undetermined.

According to this summary of the survey, the main causes of bickering among couples is as follows:

• Not listening – 112 fights a year
• Overspending – 109
• Money – 108
• Laziness – 105
• Snoring – 102
• Bills – 98
• What to eat for dinner – 92
• Driving too fast – 91
• Walking past things that need to go upstairs – 90
• Dirty house – 90
• What to watch on television – 89
• Disciplining the children – 88
• Dirty clothes left around the house – 88
• When to have sex – 87
• Taking each other for granted – 84
• Children’s bedtime – 83
• Getting home late from work – 82
• Not taking washing out  – 82
• Getting in the way in the kitchen – 82
• Treading mud into the house – 80
• Spoiling the children – 79
• Who should cook the evening meal – 79
• Swearing in front of the children – 79
• Not closing cupboard doors – 79
• Parking the car – 77
• Not answering your phone – 76
• Failing to say please/thank you – 75
• Not saying ‘I love you’ – 69

Phew. Reviewing this list makes me wonder if these couples even like each other. Who bickers over every little thing? I mean really … arguing 69 times per year about not saying “I love you” frequently enough? Really?

Reading a few of the comments that followed this article (largely, it must be admitted, from those who deny bickering that frequently or who say the survey is “a load of rubbish”), this one jumped out: “I am sure lots of people have great relationships and argue rarely. However having read all the comments on this post, I find it amazing how many people are in denial and claim they have only had five arguments in five years. etc. People in good relationships argue, it is par for the course. As someone said, if you bottle it up you only later on explode and end up almost killing an innocent person who has nothing to do with your domestic issues while you are driving a car, at a party, a family gathering and in the workplace. Come on people, stop playing the perfect couple game and try to be a little bit sincere and honest, you will feel better for it.”

Okay, I’m being sincere and honest: Don and I maybe bicker once or twice a year. Maybe. I don’t think either of us would want to stick it out for 35+ years if we argued constantly. Are we normal or unusual? I don’t know.

(Bonus comment from another person I’m posting simply because it’s so beautifully and colorfully British: “Men ‘don’t listen’ because most wives talk incessant twaddle in such biblical quantity that we simply turn our ears off.”)

So … how often do you bicker with your partner? Is this survey “twaddle” or is it accurate?