The Three Things Everyone Really Wants

18 November 2017

 - One of the strangest things about life is that, deep down, whether or not we admit it, we hunger for the same things, no matter who we are, or where we’re from, or what we do. Not material things, of course. But nor what we’re taught to desire: money, sex, fame, and power, all of which are just easy ways to pretend we don’t really want something deeper, truer, more meaningful and lasting and significant and worthy from this life. Pretending all that, which is living a lie, leads to great inner pain which, if it’s not tended to, only grows. I’ll come back to that.

To be seen, to be held, and to be known. They’re the three things everyone wants. I can prove it to you with a sentence: imagine you had all the material stuff in the world you ever wanted, all the money, sex, power, and so on, now double it, now double it again, but no one — not a single soul — ever really saw you, held you, or knew you. I’d bet you’d be depressed, hollow, and broken in just a year or two, because every bit of pleasure would only hurt that much more.

The strange truth is this. Though these are the three things everyone really wants, almost no one knows how to give them (except maybe babies and puppies), and so the world spins in pain, anger, shame, and rage. Let’s consider it for a moment. How often do people really see you? Hold you? Know you? What happens when they don’t?